Mind Control?
It is interesting to observe the variety of reactions that come from witnessing a magic effect. Some people relish in the moment with a child-like enthusiasm; while others resist and intellectually prod poking holes in the effect, draining the moment of all its mystery.
So the question remains: why are some individuals willing to let go and enjoy the foreign experience that magic delivers, while some seemingly cannot drop their defense mechanisms long enough to be blanketed by the magical experience?
In this month’s article I am going to dive in deep into the human psyche to answer these important questions and provide you (the magician) with a deeper understanding of what is psychologically going on in the minds of these difficult spectators.
So there I was in Las Vegas enjoying the company of good friends and like most social gatherings once people know that you are a magician, the requests start pouring in.
So the cards break out and I start my routine. In the midst of my magic performance, which by this time was going very well, I noticed that there was one spectator who was separate from the crowd. His defiant expression spoke volumes of his discontent with what he was witnessing.
That is when the challenges began. It came in the middle of my performance of The Coolest Ace Trick in the World. The man exclaimed in a booming voice “I know what you are doing!” Understanding where he was going with this I calmingly replied “well then, from one magician to another I believe you can appreciate the craftsmanship of a well practiced routine.”
My reply was calculated to determine if this gentleman was an ego-based spectator or a control-based spectator. Generally ego-based spectators love to be the center of attention and of course the magic I was performing that night became the focus of this gathering.
Through my past experiences and my understanding of psychology I understood that the best way to deflate conflict with an aggressive ego-based spectator is to throw them an “Ego Bone.” In this case by saying “from one magician to another” I placed this man equally to me, which in most ego battles removes the motive for conflict. But unfortunately he did not stop there.
This is where it got interesting. The man continued to challenge every move, every gesture, and continue to proclaim he knew every sleight I performed. I stood there witnessing the once contagious enthusiasm of the audience suffocated by this spectator’s relentless exclaims of discredit.
I found myself feeling uneasy and wondering what could have provoked such aggression. It was not like I was selling carrot juice a cure for cancer. I was entertaining them with no other intention except for wanting to amaze and provide an experience that some of the audience members have never witnessed firsthand.
But the seemingly negative experience suddenly starting to be a lesson I will never forget. It became clear to me what was going on inside the mind of this difficult spectator. That clarity started to emerge when he exclaimed “You can’t fool me!” I replied “my intention is not to fool you, but simply entertain.”
He snapped back “There is no such thing as real magic. It is all sleight of hand and gimmicks.” This is where I started to lose my cool, which is rare for me. But for some reason I was stunned by his sure disregard for my craft. I sarcastically shot back, “Well I never claimed that I knew any witchcraft, sorcery, or voodoo for that matter, however, if you continue with this I will have to pull a monkey from your butt.” In retrospect that was not the best thing to say. This obviously escalated the conflict.
At this point I drew a line to a battle I never intended to wage. Some words were exchanged and in his last effort to make a point he struck the cards I was holding, scattering all over the floor and stomped away. In a professional setting my response may have been considered inappropriate, which I would agree because in my perspective I lost my mind control.
Think about it; which one of us was in control is this situation, was it the man or was I in control? Obviously the man was in control because I adopted his combative mentality, and in the end the magic was ruined and he got the last non-verbal statement. I believe that the most important lessons in life present themselves in failure. So what can we learn from this experience?
The type of spectator this man was is what I would define as control-based. Control-based spectators do not like the thought of not knowing, which in turn gives them a sense of control loss. Understand that people in general react either cautiously or aggressively to threatening situations.
Unknowns can be very threatening to some people, and their reactions can derive from the fight or flight mechanism. Though this man was aggressive taking on more of the fight reaction, some will simply act uninterested and walk away taking on the flight reaction.
I believe that mankind’s last true liberty is our thoughts: our minds. Mind control has fascinated and terrified Sci-Fi readers throughout the ages. Why? The thought of losing your thoughts can be an uneasy thought, what?!? In this example the conflict was founded on the fact that the man perceived that he was not in control.
His sense of control derived from what he knew and understood. The magic effects presented an illusion that could not easily be explained through his current knowledge base. So how did he react to this? He reacted by simply challenging and aggressively attempting to deduce my sleights and debunking my magic. I threatened this man with my illusions because he perceived my performance as a battle for mind control.
In retrospect the man was correct, because though I initially did not intend to engage in this battle in the end I found myself unintentionally fighting for control with this gentleman. Child Psychology has taught me that the confrontation that transpired between the man and me can be compared to conflicts we see between parents and children.
Think about this for a moment; we have all witnessed a parent being dragged helplessly by the will of their children, but there are cases in contrast where the parents rule with an iron fist. Both cases end in power struggles that inevitably result in emotional strain and relational division.
Power struggles for control never end in a win/win situation. On the contrary they end in unnecessary conflict, and if analyzed carefully they never achieve the objectives the parties originally set out for. In the example with the confrontational man, I never had dealt with a control-based spectator which put me on the defensive and ultimately caused me to react in a way that contradicted my professionalism. Though the solution came to me in retrospect, the lesson will stay with me for the rest of my life. The answer is that you need to give up a little control to gain control.
There are some cases where, in my professional opinion, that the best thing to do is to walk away, however, the understanding of what these difficult spectators are going through psychologically can give you an empathic perspective that will allow you to deal with these situations calmly and compassionately.
Remember there are no mind control battles that exist outside of your mind because the true enemy is found within. As a magician you must keep in mind that you have no control over your external circumstances, for example how people are going to react.
However, you do have control over your internal responses, how you consciously choose to handle the situation. Professionalism is measured by our ability to remain responsive rather than reactive. Once you adopt a reactive mentality you have lost control, giving the control to your external circumstances.
I know that there were times I wanted to master the deadly art of ninja card throwing, so that I could neutralize a difficult spectator by burying a card into the wall next to his head sending an unsettling message. If you had similar fantasies refrain from carrying this out to fruition because all you will achieve is magically turning yourself into an ass.
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